SKIRMISHER

There seems to be a growing number of people who hate iPods.

First, the goat is about the non-user-replaceable battery. The Neistat brothers, like other early adopters, realized in September 2003 that once an iPod’s battery dies on you, Apple taps its cigar on a gold-plated ashtray, coolly blows smoke in your face, and tells you, “Now, you just have to buy a new iPod.”

So the Neistat duo makes this iPod’s dirty secret film, which I believe “inspired” Apple to introduce what it now calls “battery replacement program for the ipod for a fee of $99 and an extended warranty for the ipod for $59.”

Second, it’s the way iPod gives birth to “iPeople”–humans who no longer communicate with other humans, who thereby destroy culture.

Says the UK-based Anti-iPod site:

More and more people are beginning to believe that Apple (the company who make iPods) are monitoring iPeople everywhere, watching their every move and location gathering intelligence about its users. It is now becoming a strong belief across the net that the FBI also have some involvement in the matter. Although slightly extreme sounding at first, this isn’t too hard to believe as all new mobile cell phones are now equipped with GPRS which means the handsets location can be tracked accurately to the nearest metre any where in the world! Could this or something similar be installed in iPods? Who knows what else Apple could have wired up inside those little devices! This would explain the higher price of iPods compared to a lot of its competition and would also explain why Apple insists you register all your details with them on purchasing an iPod. Have you also noticed that many competitions, offers and promotions are giving away ipods? They are being distributed to victims at an alarming rate!

They also think small aliens live in iPods, and they offer proof for it. This is heavy shit. I’m taking this seriously.

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