SKIRMISHER

As reported by the police’s very prestigious This Is Not A Joke Department, two men were arrested in North Lauderdale for beating a duck to death.

“Investigators questioned Santos Murcia-Rosa, 23, and Roberto Landaverde-Mancia, 22, then booked each of the North Lauderdale residents on a charge of animal cruelty, a third-degree felony punishable by up to 5-years in prison.

According to Graf, Murcia-Rosa told detectives that he and the other men had been fishing at the lake and were using bread as bait. He said the ducks kept “stealing” the bait so they used a stick to try to move a duck away. Murcia-Rosa said when the duck kept coming back they started hitting the animal harder.”

A third suspect is still at large, making hordes of ducks demand for police protection. But given the politics of our day, it might be granted only to some privileged ducks who knew people in high places.

LINK via THE DAILY PULP

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