SKIRMISHER

Claudio Pinto of Brazil earns easy money by standing in some corner and begin popping his eyes out, which he can push 95% out of their sockets. His show amazes normal people that they, like zombies, automatically fish wads of cash from their purses and give it all to him.

“I can pop my eyes out four centimetres each, it is a gift from God, I feel blessed,” he so happily chirps.

This is something I can envy, but why stop at generic eye-popping shows that can quickly become boring? Wouldn’t it be wonderful if our cute guy here lets kids poke his eyes with bamboo sticks dipped in salsa sauce? He can charge higher talent fees; think about it.

via WARREN ELLIS

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