SKIRMISHER

Ex-Dell employee David Weaver gets a hard-on whenever somebody mentions the name “Intel,” so his lifelong dream is to share his erotic enthusiasm with many kindred aficionados around the world. Hence, his $20 apiece 3-ounce bottles containing the holy smashed relic of the Intel shell, a now-demolished Intel facility in Austin, Texas. David personally reassures those who will order that each bottle is filled with 3 delightful ounces of indistinguishable liquid (and that you will get bits of solid, too! Huzzah!). If, however, you somehow find some lipstick smear of a kiss on the edges of the bottle, rest assured knowing that such is David’s way of expressing to you his bottomless gratitude for sharing his life’s joy.

Stumble it!