SKIRMISHER

Every Briton knows that the toughest thing in the world is cooking eggs; as Forrest Gump said, it’s like opening a box of chocolates, you’ll never know if you’re really getting it soft-, medium-, or hard-boiled (I just don’t exactly remember if he was referring to eggs, but I’m sure Forrest Gump said something). So the top-notch scientists at British Lion Quality Eggs developed something that’s even better than sliced bread and split-crotch panties: idiot-proof eggs.

The experts at the British Egg Information Service have been inundated with queries — so much so that they have decided to eliminate the guesswork once and for all.

Their solution? A self-timing egg imbued with the powers of heat-sensitive invisible ink that turns black the minute that it is ready. All you need to do is decide whether you prefer your eggs soft, medium or hard-boiled, and buy accordingly.

A spokeswoman for Lion Quality Eggs, the service’s quality assurance scheme, said: “We had a lot of inquiries. We said OK, this is a big issue — people can’t even boil an egg.”

With smart eggs like these, you can eat eggs every single frigging day of your life. Yeah, who does not want that?

Link via SPLOID

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