SKIRMISHER

If you have at least £40 million to spare, and drinking the blood of languid virgins sound to you like a drive-thru trip to McDonald’s, you might want to snatch up Castle Dracula.

This is Transylvania’s hottest property. The inspiration for Bram Stoker’s Count Dracula, the 15th-century tyrant Vlad the Impaler once called it home, but now its current owner Dominic von Habsburg prefers to live in the USA than romance with Vlad’s ghost.

In keeping with its colourful past, the castle sits atop a 200ft tall rock overlooking the village of Bran, 105 miles from Bucharest. The rooms and towers surround an inner courtyard. Other rooms are connected through underground passages.

The asking price is partially explained by the presence of a rich collection of Romanian and foreign furniture and objets d’art from the 14th to 19th centuries. Seven acres of forest and three smaller buildings are included in the sale.

I think I’ll go and check the contents of my purse and see if my coins could somehow amount to 40 million pounds. I gather that girls easily fall into the trap of the pick-up line, “Wanna hang out at Dracula’s place?” It’s hardcore, and chicks dig it.

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