Soaring Gas Prices Force Astronauts To Skip The Shuttle And Just “Telecommute” Like Normal People

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With fuel prices in the U.S. now averaging $4.07 per gallon and climbing, no one has been harder hit than NASA astronauts. To lessen that impact, NASA has announced that it will now allow its non-essential astronauts to telecommute.

“We were seeing a steady exodus of astronauts leaving the space program for jobs where they can earn $10,000 a month working at home in their underwear,” said NASA Administrator Michael Griffin. “There were just too many yellow signs nailed to telephone poles near the base. Way too many.”

Although it looks very cool, driving the Space Shuttle will cost you. The shuttle burns 540,000 gallons of fuel just to go 200 miles, costing $2,197,800 to fill the tank. If you rent the Shuttle from Hertz, that jumps to $3,421,675. That’s roughly 3.7037 x 10-4 miles per gallon, which ranks just slightly more fuel-efficient than the Hummer H2, which gets 3.7036 x 10-4 mpg.

“I mortgaged my house twice for our last trip — twice!” said Cmdr. Kenneth Ham, pilot of STS-124, the Space Shuttle’s most recent flight. “Why would I do that again when I can work from home and wear my favorite, ‘One Tequila, Two Tequila, Three Tequila, Floor’ shirt?”

Astronaut self-photo

{Photo: The best out-of-this-Earth self-photo ever}

{Intriguing: How astronauts poop in space}

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