SKIRMISHER

The venom of a Brazilian spider (Phoneutria nigriventer), aside from being incredibly painful, can give any man an uncomfortable hours-long erection.

“The erection is a side effect that everybody who gets stung by this spider will experience along with the pain and discomfort,” said study team member Romulo Leite of the Medical College of Georgia, presumably speaking only about male bite victims. “We’re hoping eventually this will end up in the development of real drugs for the treatment of erectile dysfunction.”

Scientists are currently trying to develop a synthetic version of the spider’s venom to remove all its disturbing side-effects, but for the mean time, if you spot old naked men stalking the usual hangout of these spiders, and a flock of innocent bleeting sheep nearby, for Christ’s sake save the sheep!

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