SKIRMISHER

* Scientists discover a new way to kill cancer cells: By cleverly instructing them to fuck off and die.

* Microsoft hearts Toshiba, and tells the Jap to manufacture its upcoming Zune toys. Bells and whistles include a 30 GB hard drive, 3-inch screen, built-in FM tuner, and the ability to be a “social butterfly.”

* The caffeinated kids, the zombie generation, and how frappuccino has become the new mashed potatoes.

* Dead child porn: In war, famine, and monumental failure, why do we always care about the children?

* There’s nothing like mindless, noisy TV to shut up the kids.

Stumble it!