SKIRMISHER

* Kelly Brook’s cleavage has been scientifically proven to be the greatest, best-smelling mammary glands mankind has ever encountered.

* “Farting as a Defence Against Unspeakable Dread” and nine other bizarre scientific papers you never thought existed.

* Looking for the best way to get laid? Join a Christian congregation! That’s where sexually addicted Christian women are!

* James Watson, co-discoverer of the DNA structure, either said “blacks are more stupid than whites”, or the subtler “Africans are less intelligent than Westerners.” Or something similarly exciting like that.

* Frenchman Francois Zanella shows how a real man builds a cruise ship: you do it single-handedly, right at home, and in full sight of your gawking gay neighbors.

* The B9 Robot from the TV show Lost in Space (1965-1968) can now be bought for a very reasonable price of only $25 grand! It’s that cheap!

* Your shit — not bullshit — can save the planet in a probably disgusting way.

* Some people actually know you’ve always wanted to extinguish your cigarette in some naked girl’s mouth.

* Samurai sword cuts bullets in half.

* Neuroscientist Anders Sandberg uploads human brains into computers for the sake of immortality.

* Dante’s Moustache and Beard Beauty Parlor.

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