SKIRMISHER

* NASA is developing Orion, presumably inspired by all those jaded nights of watching Jenna Jameson in the teevee room while waiting for the long-awaited “All your base are belong to us!” from the star Vega, as Orion instantly reminds you of some butt plug designed to probe your anus… I mean, Uranus.

* The Japanese reject naked and pregnant Britney Spears. Harper’s should’ve shown the “special” Japanese version of the cover, in which Britney is having sex with an octopus. They’ll like that.

* The Bible’s most hideous war crime all started with a bad date.

* Mary’s day off: The Holy Mother of God seems a bit bored with having nothing to do up there aside from strumming the harp, as indicated by all these naughty manifestations.

* If you’re wondering who writes these posts on the Skirmisher, I’ll let you in on a little secret: No one. It’s purely software, baby. And we’re not the only clever ones.

Stumble it!