Here are six exceptionally bizarre, unresolved mysteries you can conveniently memorize and tell the kids, in order to give them the gift of screaming nightmares. For instance, the case of the Mary Celeste, which sailed one day in 1872 with a crew of experienced seamen, only to be found days later with not a single person on board. The weird shit? Everything in the ship–well, almost everything — was found intact. The crew were never seen again. Crazy. That’s why it’s a delight to tell!
A mysterious cloud shaped like that cool deadly earthling-annihilating shit-aliens from Independence Day appeared over Moscow, sending UFO enthusasts’ panties in a twist. And just when everybody’s screaming and running for cover, or having end-of-the-world orgies, rational “scientific” explanations from Moscow’s weather department had to kill all the fun: “Several fronts have been passing through Moscow recently, there was an intrusion of the Arctic air too, the sun was shining from the west — this is how the effect was produced.” Oh, bummer.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHOPxVM6oIw[/youtube]
The woman pictured below is Ingrid Newkirk, and she’s been making testicles shrink recently because of what normal people refer to as her “bizarre will,” which, among other things, instructs PETA to use “the meat of her body for a human barbecue,” her skin made into leather products, her feet turned into umbrella stands, and at least one of her eyes removed and delivered to the administrator of the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency, probably to engage said administrator in an eternal stare-down contest.
Read the whole shit here.
By inserting into her anus a hundred marbles — while she’s drunk and shit-faced — of course!
My wife has 2 problems. One is the fact that everytime she gets drunk she gets mean. She always looks for a fight, or a way to make me feel like shit me. The other problem is that every morning after she gets drunk she has an explosive watery shit. One night she pushed me to far.
She was drunk of course and felling a little frisky so we we messing around and I tried to put it in the butt, she got mad and started talking shit, about how I’m no good and my dick is small, and that she probally wouldn’t even feel it. so we never did have sex.
After she went to sleep I couldn’t get the pain of her saying my dick was small out of my head. I wanted to embarrass her as much as she embarrased me. So I got an Idea
I went to my sons room and got his bad of marbles. i then went to my secret stash and got a bottle of lube. I could just image her reactions when you shit marbles the next morning. I lubed them up one at a time and slowly pushed each one in. About a hundered in all. I got so excited I jerked off then giggled my self to sleep.
The next morning I woke up so excited I couldn’t stand it. I made allot of noise getting dressed so she would wake up. She did and not 3 minutes later she said ” oh my stomach. not again” and ran to the bathroom. I was in thee brushing my teeth. Usually she would tell me to leave but the urge was to intense. She sat down and let it rip.
She dam near had a heart attack from the noise. The marbles hitting the porcelin sounded like a machine gun going off in the bathroon. She turned white as a sheet and stood up. Still shitting all over the place. Marbles rolling all over the floor as they bounced around. It took her a couple of minutes to put it all together. She said ” What the ****” I just laughed and laughed as she packed her shit and left.
I really do kind of miss her though.
This video of a song called “Buchstabe” by some German band called Knorkator is definitely WTF, with a hint of LOL.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUcSTyD2T7M[/youtube]
One semi-Schadenfreude-y video about one woman’s struggle to “greet” Pope Benedict XVI using Chuck Norris fists.
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A bunch of friends tried to waken the “man” out of some “wimpy” scorpion, and they succeed quite awesomely.
Click to enlarge and read.
In 1780 the Italian anatomy professor Luigi Galvani discovered that a spark of electricity could cause the limbs of a dead frog to twitch. Soon men of science throughout Europe were repeating his experiment, but it didn’t take them long to bore of frogs and turn their attention to more interesting animals. What would happen, they wondered, if you electrified a human corpse?
Galvani’s nephew, Giovanni Aldini, embarked on a tour of Europe in which he offered audiences the chance to see this stomach-turning spectacle. His most celebrated demonstration occurred on January 17, 1803 when he applied the poles of a 120-volt battery to the body of the executed murderer George Forster.
When Aldini placed wires on the mouth and ear, the jaw muscles quivered and the murderer’s features twisted in a rictus of pain. The left eye opened as if to gaze upon his torturer. For the grand finale Aldini hooked one wire to the ear and plunged the other up the rectum. Forster’s corpse broke into a hideous dance. The London Times wrote, “It appeared to the uninformed part of the bystanders as if the wretched man was on the eve of being restored to life.â€
Other researchers tried electrifying bodies, with the specific hope of restoring them to life, but with no success. Early nineteenth-century experiments of this kind are considered to have been one of Mary Shelley’s main sources of inspiration when she wrote her novel Frankenstein in 1816.
Mary Tofts (c.1701 – January 1763), also called Mary Toft, was a maidservant from Godalming, England, who in 1726 became the subject of considerable controversy when she hoaxed doctors into believing that she had given birth to at least sixteen rabbits.
Tofts was twenty-five years old and married at the time to Joshua Tofts, a journeyman clothier, and despite a miscarriage in August had still seemed pregnant. She went into apparent labor and the Guildford male-midwife John Howard arrived to assist. Howard reported that Mary told him she and a friend had been weeding in a field when they saw two rabbits and chased them: the escape of the rabbits created “such a longing” in Mary that she miscarried and from then on could think of nothing but rabbits. Soon, Howard recorded, she began producing parts of animals: a rabbit’s liver, the legs of a cat, and, in a single day, nine baby rabbits.[1] Howard sent letters to some of England’s greatest doctors and scientists asking for help investigating the situation, and among those who came to his assistance were Nathaniel St. Andre, surgeon-anatomist to King George I, and Sir Richard Manningham, the most famous obstetrician in London. Tofts gave birth to several more dead rabbits in their presence.
On January 22nd I had a major operation. They opened a 13 centimer section of my spinal cord and removed a tumour. The doctors say they have never, in thousands of operations, ever seen a tumour like it.
It looks like a salamander and has clearly defined eyes and a tail. I took a picture of it with my cell phone camera.
It may be what was responsible for the weird visions I had of the nature of the universe. Since it was on my spinal cord it was directly attached to my brain.
As I said before, it has what appears to be eyes and a mouth and the doctors reported some hard matter (spine?) in the tail of the creature. It was 8.3 cm long.
I have asked the doctors for hi rez pictures. It has been sent to a lab for testing but results are not expected for 10 days. However, one of the doctors told me the tail seemed to have a bony structure in it. That is not something you would expect to find in a tumour made of nerve cells. Also, you can see what look like eyes. This really is bizzare.
By the way, I feel just fine except for the fact they sawed open my back-bone.
– Benjamin Fulford (excerpted from email)
Hallucinate without the costly illegal drugs! Here’s how.
[youtube]http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=PMBXJ9I3pJM[/youtube]
Lady with sexy British accent explains the wonders of dietary fiber and making bread and… ZOMFG, is that human?
The 19-year-old vagina of a 19-year-old Chinese woman named Yang was so utterly ripped apart when a water fountain at the town square in Henan Province in China burst from below her and hurling her in the air. When she landed, Yang was bleeding like a motherfucker. She was taken to the hospital, where doctors discovered the jet of water from the fountain destroyed her vagina and seriously damaged her intestines,
Above, Yang shows the scars of the surgeries done to save her, while below, she points at the bad, baaad water fountain.
I mean, come on! It was like 50 paces to the nearest restroom! I sat there in my car wondering what the hell you were up to – you spent at least two minutes scurrying around your parked car, looking to see if the coast was clear. I thought you were going to like break into someone else’s car, or something. Then I guessed you thought you were “safe†and hurried to the front of your car, near the third level stairwell, dropped your pants, squatted and WENT TO IT! For Christ’s sake, woman! All the time you spent looking out for passing cars so no one would see you crapping like a dog in public, you could have hustled your lazy ass downstairs and into the building and USED THE DAMNED RESTROOM! Sheesh! Anyway – if you’re free later, drop me a line. I was never more turned on in my life.
– From “7 most bizarre Craigslist personals.”
{Image: Viceland}
A young Chinese woman was left partially deaf following a passionate kiss from her boyfriend.
The 20-something from Zhuhai in Guangdong province arrived at hospital having completely lost the hearing in her left ear, said local reports.
The incident prompted a series of articles in the local media warning of the dangers of excessive kissing.
“While kissing is normally very safe, doctors advise people to proceed with caution,” wrote the China Daily.
