SKIRMISHER

Paraguayan President Nicanor Duarte isn’t really just being uncaring and unthoughtful. He actually had a “silver object” to give to the Pope on Monday, promise! And it was so awesome Murphy’s Law (a force more powerful than that of the Vatican) caused it to appropriately go missing somewhere between France and Italy. Of course, the [...]

From what we hear, four kids with some sense of humor and calling themselves People for the Ethical Treatment of Robots had robots carry “protest signs” that say “Make code not war,” “Thou shalt not press others’ kill switch,” and “Extendable arms are for hugging,” during an exciting robot-kill-robot event called “Robot Conflict.” Alright, it’s [...]

* Just in case you’re wondering if Kim Kardashian’s big hot ass is real, here’s Playboy’s burning gospel of truth. But don’t be looking for pubic hair.
* Google’s cobbling together a creature called “Maka Maka” to hopefully devour Microsoft’s shiny new Facebook bitch.
* How John Papandripoulos ramped up the Internet.
* The outrageous stupid shit people [...]

Remember how Stalin had lots of fun with photographs? Well, it wasn’t only him, but also Adolf Hitler, Mao Tse Tung, Oprah Winfrey, and basically everyone who is anyone!
And considering the apparent popularity of slicing one’s head and placing it on a better model’s body, we’re pointing you to another awesome specimen: Angelica Panganiban.

OMG, Paul Croft’s “Albus Dumbledore” back tattoo is now freaking him out! You know, since JK Rowling outed the character, Paul couldn’t walk a block without looking over his shoulders for fear of somebody jumping on him and vigorously begin humping his ass.
Proud Paul, 36, spent a YEAR having the Hogwarts headmaster etched into his [...]

The Halloween costume that PWNS all other Halloween costumes.

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Each of these Worth1000 photoshop jobs paint a thousand words on the high-falutin’ topic of zombie-ness.

Quick!: what has four dicks, two of which retract like a Decepticon penis, and looks so cute you never thought it knew anything about sex?
The spiny anteater’s (Tachyglossus aculeatus) four-headed phallus had been puzzling scientists. “When we tried to collect semen by [electrically-stimulated ejaculation] before, not only did we not get a single drop, but [...]

* Astronauts finally discover that the Space Station’s vibrations are being caused by metal-on-metal grating, and not by good old astronaut-on-astronaut hardcore action.
* University of Utah scientists have created worms (C. elegans) as gay as a row of moustache-twirling reality TV show judges.
* What you’ve always wanted to know about the secrets of Internet bandwidth [...]

Just another of those skills that will help you get laid.

And remember, mom: the earlier you start them, the better sluts they shall become!

The cake is actually mine. But what you don’t see are the three live ninja guinea pigs buried underneath it, all ready to spring into action the moment a fork hits the center. Awesome!

Shockingly, the White House had, after all, a ready-made speech drafted by presidential speechwriter William Safire for President Richard Nixon, just in case Apollo 11 (carrying famous astronauts Neil Armstrong and Edwin Aldrin) would meet something tragic during that historic year of 1969.
Fate has ordained that the men who went to the moon to explore [...]

Although this giant squid took home the gold at this year’s Kinetic Artbot Robogames event, many people feel (yes, all three of them) that the silver medalist R/C Steam Centipede from Taiwan should have gotten the top prize. Aside from the sense of steam punk romanticism invoked by the Centipede, it’s also cool to look [...]

What fabulously worked with other people like Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian wouldn’t really fly with somebody from Asia, it seems. After Vietnamese star Hoang Thuy Linh’s sex video began populating the interwebs, thereby inspiring her hordes of teenaged fans to fuck their peers like what they’d do anyway, things are no longer the same [...]

* Japan’s “Great Robot Exhibition” is a must see.
* The wedge-proof underwear and other crazy inventions we’re hoping somebody actually builds.
* If the White House were an animal, it would be a fucking ostrich burying its fucking head in the fucking sand.
* Growing human eyeballs in the lab is not actually for food.
* Oh, alright. [...]

The louse called Cymothoa exigua’s gameplan is simple: enter through some fish’s gills, attach itself to the base of the fish’s tongue, eat the tongue (or wait till it shrinks to nothingness by way of atrophy) and when it’s gone, become the new tongue. Clever sonofabitch.

Cymothoa exigua in action.
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